“All I want to do right now is have a glass of wine in the bathtub, pay a cleaning service to clean the kitchen, then order pizza and eat cookies all night.” – me, about ten minutes ago
The middle of the week is my Monday. I know this. I have observed it about myself in the past, yet somehow I am still blindsided by the overwhelming feeling that I will never get caught up that often hits me on Wednesdays and Thursdays. So far, I have eaten four cookies over the past two days. Um, and several handfuls of M & M’s. Not my shining moments of self-control. And I still want to order pizza. The cleaning service is a bit ridiculous, I will admit. But the glass of wine in the bathtub might win.
Taking 100% Responsibility
I am pretty sure the times I feel overwhelmed I am not taking 100% responsibility. I learned about taking 100% responsibility from chapter one of Jack Canfield’s book How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be.
Jack Canfield says to take 100% responsibility for everything in our lives. Whether or not we think we are responsible for everything in our lives is irrelevant. Take responsibility for it anyway. Taking responsibility for everything that happens in our lives means we are coming from a place of being empowered rather than the place of playing the victim.
Oh and have I played the victim! In the moment, it feels easier to try to blame everyone and everything outside of myself for my present moment misery. Too many things on my to-do list? Not enough time to get it all done? Why not repeat over and over in my mind how everyone but me is responsible for it, rather than just doing it?
Here’s Why Not
Not taking 100% responsibility is synonymous with giving up our power. If I think someone else is the reason I am overwhelmed or why I am too busy, then I am, in a way, giving them some control over me and giving away a piece of my own sense of freedom and independence.
The moments when I tell myself I am going to get on top of the things I want to get on top of, I feel good. I feel empowered. Like I have the power to make things happen, get things done, and be in charge of my own life. The opposite of that is the moments of despair when I give up on my plans and go on a mini cookie and chocolate binge.
Taking 100% responsibility is like hope in action. I believe in my vision for my life, and I hope for it everyday. When I am actually acting on the things that will give me a better chance of succeeding at realizing my dreams, I am taking back the control of my own life. I am not giving it to someone else who I believe held me back.
Responsibility & Choices
Coming from a place of complete responsibility gives us more choices. If I am taking 100% responsibility, I get to decide what’s next. Living from the place of the victim takes away the ability to choose to be different. A victim doesn’t get the choose. A victim is stuck with limitations.
We can choose to take responsibility, and then we can start to make different choices that afford us inches closer to our dreams. It’s kind of fun to start making the choices of doing what we want and to realize that there was never anyone stopping us but ourselves all along.
It can be scary to take 100% responsibility because it means being vulnerable to the potential for failure. I would rather fail trying to make my dreams come true than fail because I never tried.
As Paulo Coehlo says, it is fighting the good fight. The good fight for our dreams is a fight worth fighting. It’s not easy. At times, it completely sucks. But it sucks way less than doing nothing. So I will choose to do something, then another something, and another on the very long path to my dreams. It’s a long, winding path. But it’s a worthwhile path to follow.
What do you think about the concept of taking 100% responsibility? Do you think we should or shouldn’t? Please share your thoughts below! Namaste and cheers!
image credit: cimoetz